Working mother blues....

You know how sometimes things your kids say just hit you...like a ton of bricks? well, that happened to me last night.

Molly: Mommy, I go to school on Saturday.

Me: No, sweetie you don't have school on Saturday.

Molly: Mommy, do we get to hang out on Saturday? you and me?

Me (holding back a tear and a chuckle for the use of this new phrase): Of course we will hang out on Saturday!

Molly: ok, good! Mommy let's hang out and go to the zoo!

Watch out world, Molly's making plans. She's got her Saturday all planned out. And then I think about how the weekends are really where the majority of our time is spent together. While I trot off to work everyday Molly goes to daycare. Ugh....I really hate the word daycare....so we call it school.

Molly loves school. Mommy loves Molly's school. All is good. BUT.....there is always going to be that twinge of guilt because I don't get to spend as much time as I would like with her.

Sometimes I am mad about this because why can't I be a stay at home mom?. But then I realize that I am defined as a mother, but I am also defined by my career. I would not be a good or happy mom if I stayed home. I really need to be thankful because I have the best of both worlds. I'm not a SAHM or a WOHM, but I am a "WMWAFS" -WORKING MOTHER WITH A FLEXIBLE SCHEDULE". I totally made my own stand 6 years ago when I quit the design firm I was working for to go out on my own. Jack was 4 months old and I needed that flexibility. It was scary to take that leap, but it was so necessary not only because I was a mother now but also to grow into my own person. But that's a story for another blog post.

When Jack was little I took Monday's off to spend with him and picked him up everyday at 3:00 from Mother's Day Out. With Molly I was able to bring her to the office with me until she was 6 months old!

Perks of office life for a baby

Great napping place.

There are always people who want to hold you.

Happy as a calm. Good times at the office.

Then after that I picked her up everyday at 3:00 from MDO. Then came the need for full time childcare. For the last 2 years Molly has been at 3 different "schools" (long story) and she has loved each one of them. I have the flexibility to leave work early and pick her up, but I also have it covered so that I can work when I need to work and not worry about summer break or fall break. And because I do office with family I am able to pick Jack up from school everyday at 3:00 and bring him to the office with me.

Now that I think about it....I would say I have it pretty good and I'm happy with that.

The last three years have just flown by in the blink of an eye and I wish I could just freeze time. Just for a little bit. Just so we can have some more conversations about "hanging out" together.

Well it's about time!

After many reincarnations I think I have finally decided to stick with a blog layout. That is until I get tired of it or find something else I like better.

So what have I been up to you ask? well.....being crafty! Unfortunately I cannot complete this blog post without picture of the craftiness and of course.....I left my camera at the office. So maybe tomorrow when I'm procrastinating at work I will take some pictures to post so you can witness the result of my weekend Michael's excursion! Seriously people...this is cute stuff we are talking about!

Be still my heart....

This is one of those lucky shots that I will always be thankful for. I am by no means a photographer although I would love to be. I see a vo-tech class in my future. But you know how it is....you see that one photo that even if it doesn't show a face or an expression....it still just speaks volumes and brings forth so much emotion. This is one of those shots.

It was one of hundreds of pictures I snapped that day with a little Nikon point and shoot and the one picture that still fills my heart with love when I look at it.

Look at that chubby hand playing in the sand. You can still see the remnants of Jack's "snap on arms"....he was so chunky and had these rolls that conjured up images of the Michelin man. Look at those darling little piggies digging into the sand.....I could go on and on forever. I have no idea what happened to the original image off my camera. I'm sure it's still on a hard drive somewhere in the computer graveyard, but I'm so glad that I enlarged this to 8 x 10 and framed it.

I glance at this photo all the time when I walk past it and it always reminds me to stop for a moment and try to freeze frame my children at *this* moment....*this* day......at *this* time in hopes that I will never forget this moment in their lives because it all flies by too fast.

The rolls are no longer there and the feet have gotten bigger and my little boy will be starting 1st grade next week. Here's to hoping that I'm able to capture some more photos like this one throughout the years.

The cutest video ever!!!

wait for it.....

wait for it.....

Nope, no video. Evidently there is a setting to take digital pictures as well as movies on the flip and stupid me thought I was filming *the cutest video ever* when all I was doing was snapping very blurry digital pictures!

I'm bummed....but moving on.

So you want to know what the video was? Here is the transcript of the video that does not exist.

Me: What's your name?

Molly: Molly Katherine Lovebug!

Me: How old are you?

Molly (in the cutest voice ever): I'm three! (holds up three fingers) No more high chair for me, because I......AM......THREE!

Me: Anything else you want to say to the camera?

Molly: I tell camera a funny story. One day.....chicken walking down the road.....see egg.....become chicken! (uncontrollable laughter ensues)

Oh well....it doesn't really translate in text because you are missing the cute voice, the hilarious way she enunciates her story, how she has to work a little bit to hold up 3 fingers, and how she truthfully believes her last name is Lovebug.

My 3 year old Lovebug.

Annual birthday pancakes (or in this case an eggo waffle)

And of course some photos from the Double Gymboree Birthday Bash for Molly and Sarah!

Walking to their party

The day before.....

It's the day before Molly turns 3 and I still can't believe it. She is such an independent little girl now. Just the other morning I woke up to Molly in bed with us eating a tortilla. As I rubbed my eyes wondering what in the world I was seeing, Molly asked me to hand her the cup of apple juice that was sitting on my nightstand. I thought for sure Jack must be up and fixed Molly breakfast, but no.....Molly told me she got it all herself. I was dreading walking to the kitchen to see the mess that must be waiting for me (it was, after all, a brand new jug of apple juice) but to my surprise NO MESS! She had gotten her chair out of the play room and carried it into the kitchen to reach a cup in the upper cabinet. Then she opened the fridge, got out the NEW jug of apple juice, poured herself a cup and put the juice back in the fridge (fridge is short for fridgerator. I don't believe it really stars with a "re"). Oh and she found the bag of tortillas in the bread box. She grabbed herself one and put the bag back in the bread box.

Molly has always been determined. This is one of my favorite videos that shows her inchworm crawl and her obvious dislike for pants.